TREATMENT FOR A SAGGING SOUL:

When life’s getting you down, turn off all the screens in your life, go to the beach at low tide, write your name and birthday in the sand and watch the incoming tide take it away — or just go outside when you see a big rainstorm coming and write your name and birthday in the dirt and watch it slowly wash away — then go up on a high hill, or building that night, find the big dipper in the stars and take a long deep drink, adding liberal amounts of prayer throughout treatment, repeat as needed.

Jack